Dear Mike

It involves daily deep dives into pop music from the early Teens that I completely missed as I was busy being a debauched Seattle chef. But now, in my mostly heartbroken and uninspired middle-aged crisis, I find solace in what appears to be some pure seratonin in pop form. Thanks to Harry and his pals, you guys (and my local KEXP djs) are the raft I need to get me through this part to whatever happens next.

Hey buddy. Suppose it's just the pandemic ptsd talking, but there just seems to be so little point in planning anything anymore, it's all just kind of...weak. Nothing seems to be improving - it all just seems to be settling. I just paid a hundred bucks for 2 tickets to see our old pals (heh) in those Jaw bands who are doing a little West Coast reunion swing in celebration of the (it's a good thing you're dead, because this almost puts me under) 25th anniversary of "Dear You". I couldn't help it, especially after missing out the last time they were here (I mean I went and walked to see them perform in the stadium parking lot, but still), plus, Kim and J's band is opening. Hilariously retro and yet potentially life-affirming. And who knows maybe Chris and or J and or Kim will remember me? I mean, hey it's only been 25YEARS. Fuck me, I'm old. That being said, I hope this first show post-pandemic won't a) get me sick or b)depress the shit out o

(this post is from 9/2020, previously unpublished) Jesus effing christ Mike, you should see this. I mean, where to even start with this nonsense. Every damn chapter of this life gets weirder. Older and weirder, I mean it makes the most sense, but if I could just not be...argh. My brain hurts all the damn time now and no amount of trying to kill it (or even just put it to sleep) is working. I'm in Reno and shit is so ridiculous, it would seem I'm making it up. God bless the silly socialists and their commie pals who are fucking madly trying to keep the lid on this gang of...what to even call them? Who needs an anarchism seminar NOW? THIS GIRL. Listening to 7 Seconds is only gonna make me more feisty, but that is probably what it's gonna take to keep me from punching someone. Hah, we know I won't punch anyone, I'll just keep instigating. These fuckers. How is it you can just genuinely want people to do their own thing, and stop fucking power-tripping? I have been fuc

Awwww, Mike. Rob got a tattoo of the Won't Give Up cover today. I got choked up, and my eyes almost teared up. Which is pretty damn emo for anything that doesn't involve me being personally criticized or reviewed in any way. It looks fantastic (though it's missing cribis' signature). You would be so stoked though. He is, other than you, me and Scott (oh, and I suppose GL but, I'm not gonna lie, I don't think she loved the band as much as she loved BEING in a band, which she clearly loved more than I did, but I digress) is the only person who really seemed to GET something from being in Agent86 - or at least who is willing to admit it. Goddamn it, we lived the life, didn't we? We really were living in the moment, making it up as we went along, riding the wave. I mean, like any wave, it runs out, but you....you fucking held on to the end. Makes me feel like a coward even now. I watch Jimmy Flame, living his crazy amazing life of regeneration and I think: damn

Hey Mike. So, it's not better. Young angry guys are still mowing people down in public places all over the US. Last week, it was massage parlors in Atlanta and this week, grocery stores. Fuck this noise. I am disgusted by this country more than ever - because the whole damn pandemic, not one shooting - shit starts opening up and BAM we are back at it. Soon, I suppose we can expect kids to be slaughtered on the reg again once they are back in-person. I want to fucking call my stupid sister in law who has been posting non-stop bitching about how her kids "deserve" to be back in school. Yeah, great, then I can go back to worrying that Mason will die in the lunchroom. And then, today, at work, I had to frigging go all anarchy bear on a poor 20-year old kid who was defending Bezos' "right" to be "successful" and I couldn't help myself: NO ONE NEEDS 300+ BILLION DOLLARS. That's not success, it's just greed. I tried to couch it in "hey, i

Hey Mike, So, after listening to a bunch of (ok, a few) old songs (Asexuals, Sham 69, DOA, Angelic Upstarts, Special AKA, 7Seconds) I leashed up the dog and headed out to check on the kids in the CHAZ. Not gonna lie: it did my heart good to see what amounted to the seeds of a squat (they don't have an actual building to occupy - they are asking for the city to hand over the East Precinct, and I'm honestly not sure how that will go) all over 11th & Pine. And it was pretty damn cool. Sloppy, but cool. Easily 50 tents parked in the park, loads of tents with free supplies, medical help, saintary supplies (tp and paper towel, for free! people had been lining up for hours just weeks ago to pay jacked up prices for that stuff!). I roamed around, taking in the graffiti, the art (the BLM painted down Pine street, honestly, it was really great) I talked briefly to a girl setting up a free book exchange/library, I went up to the precinct and listened to people talking aobut plans, a

Hi Mike. So, it just keeps getting worse, so maybe it's getting better? Watching people come to terms with how fucked up America is has become paralyzing for me. It's a goddamn good thing I don't have a job to go to, because I don't think I could cope with that right now. So much residual rage from all these years of being poor. I mean, yes, I'm not black, so some things are better for me, but there are loads of ways this fucking materialistic, consumer culture hates anyone who differs from the accepted norm. Last night, at 11th & Pine, the thing I expected to happen finally did: a guy drove a car into the crowd. All of it captured on video - you can see he chickens out (thank god) and halts the car as a (black) guy who had been chasing him down the street catches up to him and punches him through the window of the car. The driver shoots the guy in the arm, and he falls back. Driver gets out, has a glock with multiple cartridges taped to the handle, and I kid yo