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Emo.

Awwww, Mike. Rob got a tattoo of the Won't Give Up cover today. I got choked up, and my eyes almost teared up. Which is pretty damn emo for anything that doesn't involve me being personally criticized or reviewed in any way. It looks fantastic (though it's missing cribis' signature). You would be so stoked though. He is, other than you, me and Scott (oh, and I suppose GL but, I'm not gonna lie, I don't think she loved the band as much as she loved BEING in a band, which she clearly loved more than I did, but I digress) is the only person who really seemed to GET something from being in Agent86 - or at least who is willing to admit it. Goddamn it, we lived the life, didn't we? We really were living in the moment, making it up as we went along, riding the wave. I mean, like any wave, it runs out, but you....you fucking held on to the end. Makes me feel like a coward even now. I watch Jimmy Flame, living his crazy amazing life of regeneration and I think: damn, he's so talented. But it's not that. It is the effort. He never sits and waits. He pursues what he wants. He is an object lesson for all of us GenX Losers. I admire his ability to regenerate. It's so weird right now. You...I don't know what you would have made of all this, but I will tell you - working folks are pissed - maybe more than they've been since the late 1890's. They say the next couple years are going to be a free-for-all, just like the roaring '20s. so far, all anyone can manage to do is (as usual) shoot each other. Oh, and try and rip apart democracy. I wish I could ask you what you think of this Q stuff - but I feel like even when I'd mentioned stuff like that before, you blew it off. So...I dunno. Anyway, Rob. He and I are still in touch. He texted me the photo of his tattoo before he posted it to social media. He was such a good guy. He was so sweet to me when you were being such an asshole (sleeping with Molly, just being a general prick), and though he was a handful in Europe (and his girlfriend almost got us arrested in the US) I still love him dearly. Because the rest of them? Meh. I mean, Scott is sweet and loves you to pieces. Eric thinks fondly of our willingness to tote him around, and Billly? IDKWTF is going on with him - he really did do too much acid. I appear to be friends on social media with Rob S (who is Roger now? Makes me question our entire existance, much less my horrific crush on him. Damn Donald Glover looking mofo), but he friended me and we never connected. Bob and I are friends on FB too, but I'm sure he has no idea who I am at this point. Rob B, same, though we were communicating a bit, but my lack of music-priority made me less interesting, for sure. Who else? Jimmy, living the high life. Julie, happily married in Scottsdale (no seriously, and her wife is aces!). I bet Scott doesn't even know where Morgan is these days. Eric B, still out there somewhere. Wes....hrmmm, haven't looked him up in a minute. The very first dude? Man, love to know if he's still around. The kid...in Arcata...Darren? Probably a mid-level government employee, like Billy's brother (who is a postmaster! No, really!). Who am I missing? That might be all of them for me, right? OH! Karl! He reached out at the beginning of covid, and we are still friends on fb, but haven't touched base again. We were gonna meet up again though. Wow. What a fucking ride. Plus all the randos. But all the coold kids who booked shows (dammit, remember Max from Ashland? Or Sam from Winnipeg((oops, Dets tour, but still)). I miss you, and the idea of you all the time. I still don't fit in. The circle of life is real - I'm back clearing print queues. The planet is burning (seriously it will be in the 100s this weekend. In Seattle. IN JUNE. Fuck this planet. I mean....anyway. Seeing Rob chose to get this ink 30 YEARS AFTER THE FACT, almost wrecked me today. I think it is also part of him getting divorced, but I might just be reading things I sse into it. At any rate - I can't even remember if YOU had A86 ink? Just know - I'm not doing it. I love you, and the experience it was, but I do not need it on my body to remember. It takes up a lot of real estate in my brain already, no reason for a visual clue. It's gorgeous though Mike, it is exactly what you wanted us all to do.

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