Skip to main content

Long-term memory losses

 Hey Mike,

Not that this will come as a shock to you (or, maybe it will, since you always seemed to think I was as adept as you at remembering all the ephemera of the punk rock life we led) but I seem to keep forgetting who the hell I am.

Floundering in normalcy is not something I am amused by.

Oddly, it was Sonic Youth's "Kool Thing" that launched me into this spiral. Fucking SHOULD NOT HAVE DONE ALL THAT ACID WHILE WORKING AT TOWER RECORDS!

Hilariously this is only funny to me, because I don't think anyone I still talk to even knows I worked at Tower Records, and probably I never told them how that fucking earwig of a song has been burned into my brain by multiple blotter doses an hour or so after count out, back in Spring of '91.

Also, I have lost another nephew (Mason) to the Trump Turbine. It's killing young minds and making them all stupid, lazy, and racist. Super disappointing because this kid was always the one I pinned my hopes on to be his own man. I guess, maybe eventually, but for now, it's super-depressing. I knew none of my nephews were ever going to be as woke (heeee!) as me, but I hoped Maso would at least not be subject to trendy race and classism. Unfortunate.

Granted, I suspected his father was one, and knew on impact his wife had, but it seemed like Mason was thinking on his own. But nope - he marched right into the fraternal order of idiots, just like his obnoxious older brother did in surrogacy of his father.

Sigh. I am going to die poor, and alone with only my moral outrage to keep me warm, it seems.

Hopefully, dementia will settle in and I just won't remember who the fuck I am or that I cared about any of this, and someone from the state can fire me.

But in this interim period, it's a tough slog.


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

It's all coming apart.

Mike. This bunch of white-power Christian zealots is not even pretending anymore. We are actively deporting residents from other countries who have lived and worked here for decades, students who have been protesting the invasion of Gaza, AND....AND frigging British tourists and Uber drivers who take a wrong turn on a bridge and end up in Canada because there is no turnaround, and when they re-enter they are being detained. And then yetsterday the vampire Nazi Stephen Miller announced they are "looking into" suspending hebeas corpus and...and allowing Afrikkaner "refusgees" (you know, rich, white people who exploited Apartheid and now hate the fact that they are required by law to pay taxes and share land ownership) to "seek asylum" here. I fucking cannot take this. They have undone Roe, they are purging the population, and the Supreme Court is about to also make Christianity the only religion (apparently) with any right to freely practicing. I fucking hat...
Post a Comment
Read more

Note to self.

Here's the thing Mike, Now that you are gone, I find being the keeper of Agent86 history awkward at best, because to be honest it should fall to GL right? Especially since she actually visited Arcata with you and I haven't been back to that vortex of weirdness in decades. None of the people in the Humboldt Punk group on the FB mayhem-generator even know who the fuck I am. Well, except for Dario. That's right, I said (wrote) Dario. Yer pal, my on-again, off-again buddy (I thought we were on the skids again because I mistakenly sent him a link to what I thought was an online sale on L&R merch, but instead was a link to online books and he was, as is sometimes apparently still a thing with him, pissed off). So I had assumed it'd be a while before I heard from him - and I guess it has been about 6 monthes. Anyway, every now and then he pops up in my FB feed, which I don't really patrol much. To my surprise when I saw the alert, he is a member of the Humboldt County ...
Post a Comment
Read more

It's not great, Mike.

Hi. So, this is just bullshit. I can't keep doing this. Maybe it's because I'm immature or unable to cope with reality, or whatever, but fuck this bullshit of people dying, especially when they seem to be finally pulling their shit together (I'm definitely not talking about you, obviously, though maybe, sorta?). So, there I was mindlessly flipping through fb on my phone at the dogpark because the pup was doing her dogyy thing, and I was seeing all these posts about Bircho, and I didn't read them, I just noticed they were people posting old pictures, and saying nice things and tagging him. I suppose I blew it off thinking it was his birthday or something. Flash forward 5 hours and I dip into the fucking kool-aid again, and there it was: fucking Bircho died in his sleep last night. Heart attack maybe? Not clear yet. But still. It's some full-on bullshit. Our generation is small and getting smaller by the goddamn minute. I'm not gonna lie Mike, this is horrib...
Post a Comment
Read more